Yesterday was a challenging day. I had a late night meeting to go to, and I had to stop off at my weekend job (coffee shop) to pick up my tips. For a fleeting millisecond I thought about grabbing a cookie with my cup of joe, but decided against it, and marched right out to my car. It is hard b/c basically, if I wanted, I could have all the free/or discounted pastries I want from the store.
Then while driving to the meeting I was daydreaming about my favorite subject, my crazy love life. I am single but there are several men in my life who are always flying around, (friends, lovers, ex-lovers, wannabe lovers, etc.) So then I start getting annoyed/fidgety/anxious about these situations in my life, and I think about stopping somewhere and eating an entire layer cake. I don’t. But I think about it.
So I now weigh 13 lbs less than I did on Friday. The problem with this is that the last three times I was at this weight I started thinking “well, I can cheat a little. I deserve it! And look how easy it is for me to lose weight. I’ll just cheat and then make up for it before my doctor’s appointment. It’s only one cupcake.” But then I have the cupcake and I think, “Well, I’m out of ketosis now, I might as well live it up for the rest of the day, I’ll start the fast again tomorrow. I can be in ketosis again 3 days from now….” But that one day turns into a week, and before you know it , I’m not fasting, I’m not eating healthy, I’m just eating. And thus the cycle goes, for the last 6 months. Which is why I keep yo-yoing from 150 to 165, again, and again.
NOT THIS TIME!
This time I have my wits about me and the blogosphere for inspiration. I will not rest or be lenient until I have reached my goal of 132. (weird number I know…I’m weird…) Then, at 132. I will have cake, but I will also not fall back on the fact that I know how to lose weight. I will instead be vigilant about keeping it off!
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5 comments:
Sounds like your in the "zone" which is a great place to be :)
13 lbs. in one week? Holy crap! Is this fast like a liquid diet only fast? Yikes I'd freak out.
Suzi- Thanks! I hope I can keep in this frame of mind. Like any other addict...one day at a time. (one second at a time!)
Chellie- It isn't a liquid fast, but it is based on the same principals as medi-fast. Only high quality animal protein and 3 servings of vegetables a day. Everything is weighed out. No added fat or sugar. No dairy. Low carb, low fat, low calorie. The first three days are the worst. I did the first 4 months with no problems...but now it is harder....
god work! that first bite is the slippery slope!
:)
Tamzin- I absolutely cannot have that first bite! It turns into a feeding frenzy. It is much better for me to just abstain. I really envy those that can have just one cookie! :)
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